We all have that one friend. You know her — the one that has a steady rotation of guys chasing after her. She might be drop-dead gorgeous, but more often than not, she seems pretty normal. So what gives? What is it about her that makes her so irresistible?
Today, we’re going to let you in on her secret: she has no secret. Really — it’s just that your desirable friend knows how to play the game. You can learn, too; in fact, we’re going to teach how to attract a man with some tips to up your desirability factor. These tips will help you get (and keep) the attention of anyone that interests you — and maybe some guys that don’t.
But before we move on, we want to emphasize one thing. This post is not about changing who you are. You’re already fantastic, and you don’t need to change who you are to attract a guy. Instead, this post is about teaching you to enhance a select few qualities so you can put your best foot forward.
How to Attract Men’s Attention: 7 Foolproof Tips
So let’s talk about how to start receiving the attention you want from men. As you’ll see, these tips have nothing to do with looks. Sure, looks come into play on one level or another, but attracting someone is about much more than your appearance.
Remember that friend we just mentioned? She’s not always the hottest girl around (however you want to define that), so it’s clear that there’s something more to the equation. Let’s take a look at the things she’s doing that you might not be.
Check Your Vibe
Question — who would you rather be around, someone boring who sucks the energy out of you or someone who’s super fun? The answer’s clear, right? People who are fun to be around naturally attract others to them. We’re not talking about being the life of the party if that’s not your thing, but being pleasant and energetic goes a long way.
So check your vibe — are you overly negative? Do you drain energy from others? If this sounds like you, it may be the reason you’re not attracting the men you want. Men are drawn to women who are happy, positive, and optimistic, so try your best to emulate these qualities.
Not only will men want to be around you, so will pretty much everyone else.
Take Him Off the Pedestal
So you’ve met a cute, fun guy, and you want nothing more than to impress him. But when the time for some interaction finally comes, you’ve built him up so much in your head that you have a hard time being natural. Now you’ve got a problem because the second you put someone on a pedestal is the second you give him permission to look down on you.
But he seems so incredible, you say. How can I avoid this, you ask. For starters, remind yourself that you know nothing about this guy. You’re assigning him more value than he may have simply because of his looks. Instead, use your interactions to discover things about him so you can learn whether he’s just a pretty face or if you really do like him.
Second, break his power over you by thinking of guys you find more attractive and more desirable. When you remember that there are plenty of options, he becomes less threatening and takes on less importance. When he turns into just one of many guys, you’ll be able to relax and be your true self.
Have you ever found yourself drawn to someone that you wouldn’t ordinarily find attractive, and you weren’t sure why? The answer is probably that this person exuded tons of confidence. Confidence is one of the sexiest qualities a person can have, and that’s because you feel it bubbling up under the surface of every interaction you have with someone.
We can pretty much guarantee that this is the one thing all these sexy women who have men falling over them have in common. They are highly confident. They know that they’ve got the goods, they know what they bring to the table, and they will let you know how great they are — in a non-cocky way, of course.
Not only is confidence super sexy, but it also draws others to you, which is why our advice is to own your confidence. Keep your standards high, and always remember what excellent qualities you have. Let your personality shine, and know what you deserve from a relationship.
What about if you’re not feeling so confident? The answer is easy: fake it till you make it.
Use Your Body Language
You have to understand how to flirt with a guy to know how to attract one. And part of becoming an expert flirt is using your body language to convey the message that you are interested. Here are some ways to flirt with him using just your body:
- Keep your arms and legs uncrossed
- Use your expressions to engage him
- Keep your hands where he can see them, and don’t ever put them in your pockets
- Make eye contact
- Lean in when you’re talking to him
One of our best pieces of advice on how to get a guy to like you is to be yourself. Don’t think you have to act a certain way to pique a guy’s interest. Dress the way you feel most comfortable, flirt however is most natural to you, and above all, drop the mysterious act.
When you behave as you truly are, you feel more at ease. Guys are drawn to women who are comfortable in their own skin, and you won’t even have to ask how to tell if a guy likes you. His interest in you will be readily apparent.
Stop Comparing Yourself
Falling into the trap of comparing yourself to other women is something we’ve all done at one time or another. And it’s completely understandable. It’s hard to look at someone who has a never-ending list of suitors and wonder what the heck it is you’re doing wrong. And from there, it’s a short jump to envying her looks, her body, her personality, or whatever.
As hard as it may be, if you want to be attractive to men, put this mindset aside. Someone who compares themselves constantly to others is insecure in some way. And just the way confidence is always bubbling up under the surface, so too is insecurity. Men are able to sense when you aren’t secure in your personality.
Our advice? Instead of focusing on others, focus on yourself. You’ll feel better when you do so. Know what you bring to the table, which will endow you with an attractive quality, and don’t worry about what other women are doing.
Here’s another quality that women who are highly successful in attracting men have in common: they are unafraid to make their interest known. As this study demonstrates, one surefire way to build attraction is to show interest, and your desirable friend knows this. She flirts with guys she finds attractive, which lets them know she’s receptive to his advances.
Showing interest doesn’t mean hanging all over him and trying to make out with him right away. Here are some ways you can communicate your curiosity without looking desperate:
- Ask him about himself. Guys love to talk about themselves, and there’s no better way to show your interest than by getting him to spill details about his life.
- Actively listen as he talks. Don’t interrupt him when he speaks, and make sure your phone is put away.
- Smile. Never underestimate the power of a smile. It’ll show that you’re engaged and interested in what he’s saying.
- Find a way to touch him. A light touch on the arm is a powerful flirting tool since it shows you don’t mind being close to him. It’s also a perfect opportunity to feel the chemistry between you.
- Sit up straight. Good posture communicates confidence, and it also conveys an interest in the conversation.
- Use his name. There’s no sweeter sound than that of our name. Use his to your advantage.
As you can see, attracting a man is all about putting your best foot forward. Make sure the energy you’re putting out is one that others want to be around. Project confidence, make your interest known, and, most of all, know your worth.
What do you think? Are there any other ways to be irresistible to men?